Two words

[beelikej]

I was reading the final chapter of Stephen Fry's The Ode Less Travelled on the bus and was struck by two words. I'm sure they were not meant to have such an impact. It was merely a list of things to think about when writing poetry and that's not even something I'm considering. But they hit me hard for personal reasons I wasn't aware of. Tears stung my eyes and I now have a knot in my stomach that's growing by the second. I have to (and want to and need to) focus on work, so I hope I can ignore this feeling until the end of the day.

FORGIVE YOURSELF

...

Comments

[beelikej.livejournal.com]

It really hit me by surprise; I was thoroughly enjoying Stephen's enthusiasm and all of sudden when I came across those words I felt so terribly sad. I had to use all my willpower to not start sobbing. I had no idea I still felt guilty about anything, I really thought I had dealt with the past.

But even though I was startled and a little shaken, thinking about the words eventually made me feel calm. Apparently it was just what I needed to hear: it's okay. I guess the tears were out of relief.